8percentchance

( Private/Hackable )

No time for filters today, so you'll just have to deal with the rambles, okay? If you don't like it, just scroll down and bother the popular girls. I'm sure they're interested in your new hat and beer pong skills.

Someone's dead, but...it looks like that's par for the course today. I...You guys, you'd better be working on those, because it'd be a real dick move, if they all got murdered and nobody gave a damn. But hey, if you want to check there's...there's still time to see the ambulance take the-the murderer away. Did anyone see anybody else with a big, black, facehiding cloak today? Because-because that person isn't around anymore. He fell. No, seriously, I swear he fell, I didn't even touch him, I was busy with--

Her name was Allison Cameron, and she was a doctor. I'd never met her before, and now...I don't think I ever will. It's not fair, it's-this kind of shit shouldn't happen to people, ever. But who was she? Does anyone know her here? Does she have any enemies, enemies that like plunging down city streets after killing innocent people? Because I think it'd be good to find out-to find out who these people are, what they were like, even if they've joined the choir invisible.

((OOC: OFF TO BED. TAGS TOMORROW. <3))

Harry Lockhart here. I'm thinking that if I want to make money in a slightly more legitimate fashion than..well, my normal method, I kind of have to have a job. But as the Ramones once said, it's not my place in a nine to five world. Just don't see me doing office work, you know how it is, would probably end up destroying a copier machine with a bat, Office Space type shit.

Oh, hell, let me start over.

Long story short: I'm opening a detective agency whether you folks like it or not. If you like it, hey, great, awesome, if you don't, fuck off, I have to make a living here somehow before I wind up with thirty million holes in my ceiling from pencil damage. I just need a totally awesome, awe inspiring name that will be instantly catchy, and yet not completely over the top.

In other words? Here, have a nice, shiny poll, for your voting pleasure.

Poll #1363872 Just be Thankful it isn't Caturday
Open to: All, detailed results viewable to: All, participants: 12

If I were running a totally legitimate Detective agency, what should I call it?

Oh, and if you pick These Choices Suck, thanks a lot, man, now tell me your better idea, I don't have all day. Well, actually, I do, but you get the point.

((OOC: ETA: Due to a misunderstanding on my part, please disregard one (1) vote for the first option! Sorry! Son of ETA: My Gmail is lagging, tags will be slow, sorry!))

( Private/Hackable )

Okay, there was a guy the other day who looks like Doogie Howser, only older and with really lame goggles. If he's still around, and I think his name is Dr. Horrible, which really should be changed---anyway, if you're still around, I just want you to know that...it was a misunderstanding. I won't fight you, it's totally cool now, it was just a curse, and I owe you a drink, or something like that.

Oh, and thanks to you kind folks who helped me figure out this curse nonsense. Seriously, I'd be totally still investigating this nonexistent murder like the Kennedy Assassination if you guys didn't stop me. Problem is I like that part of the job. I mean, it's not like I wish all you guys would get murdered or have cheating boyfriends, but I think I'm inspired. Sort of.

Okay. Okay. Okay. Fuck. Okay, so today could have gone better. I didn't get run over by a car or nearly stabbed with an ice pick, so that's a step up from the usual. But someone got fucking murdered, and kidnapped, and he said he used her in experiments to make some kind of horror movie shit. I mean, who the fuck does that? And now I've gotta find out what actually went down, or who, potentially. I mean, he could have been lying, or maybe he's just making shit up just to mess with us. People do that all the time, like the boy who cried wolf, except here I think there might be actual wolves.

Anyone here know who Karrin Murphy is? Or was it Karin? Shit, come on, remember her name, Harry. Karrin Murphy, that's right. Is she missing in the first place? She check in at a bad hotel lately? Dump an ex-boyfriend? Date a mad scientist?

((OOC: Harry's been hit with the No Internal Monologue curse for the weekend! Everyone can hear his narration! Enjoy!))

( Private/hackable )

So. I have nine fingers again, which is really odd because I was starting to get used to having all ten again. I mean, I guess it's something you don't miss until it's gone, and boy, do I miss it now. I was just getting used to it, too, the whole long lost ring finger, but to have it for a day and then have it yoinked back again? Ouch. To quote a surfer I knew, bummer.

I also have a bunch of flowers here, like, twelve of them, and I really--I mean, the person I bought them for is gone. Or wasn't here in the first place, like a hologram from Star Wars or something. Either way, I've got flowers without an owner, but you know, if anyone wants them, you can have them. I mean, I don't know what the hell else to do with these besides hang them from the ceiling and hope they stick.

[Rapid pacing and a little bit of hopping.]

Wait-Wait, hold on, Harmony, I didn't--wait, I said, look, just give me a second, okay? I fucked up. I know I fucked up, just let me explain? Right, right, I know, I know, look-- just give me a minute, okay, look, I swear I didn't even look at her. She just walked past me, seriously, and just happened to --look, no, I didn't even--okay, sure, maybe I spilled her drink, but that was later, I didn't even-- Look, I didn't even look at her, and either way she doesn't have legs like--

[Door slamming, quickly and swiftly, followed by a slump and something banging repeatedly on a wooden surface. A pause. A cigarette being lit.]

Fuck.

((OOC: Short and to the point, Harry's got his missing finger back. I'm guessing that, due to most of the plot being resolved by Harry being in the wrong place at the right time, having the finger means Harry's in the wrong places at the wrong times, and that would lead to a...lot of little issues, most important for him is that he probably would have even more troubles with Harmony, the girl of his dreams. Oh, and no, Harmony isn't here, but he thinks she is.))

( private/hackable )

I guess this is where everyone quotes a movie, right? You know, something about red pills and blue pills. Or rabbit holes and being late for some goddamn date. Or the classic not being in Kansas anymore. Only problem is, see, I wasn't in Kansas before, so that doesn't help me out here. But, you know, quoting something. Some cliched movie line that roughly translates into "where the fuck am I?!" only, you know, without the fucking. Gotta keep it clean for the soccer moms in Kansas, I guess.

So. Where the fuck am I? Oh, and more importantly, where can I get some cigarettes? That fountain on the way in apparently considers my tobacco to be an appropriate toll.

((OOC: For convenience, all of Harry's narration is in italics. OOCly, you can read it all you like. ICly, it's not public, sorry. Consider all the narration saved in a seperate word file to be uploaded later))